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my ex got married and had a baby

Eventually, she stopped responding to my messages and after 1 week of no communication I blocked her because I felt she was going to break up with me and hearing her break up with wouldve destroyed me emotionally. But once they were in the newborn fog, I could empathize with what they were going through and felt a connection to that someone with whom I share a history by association. Aaron Carter's former fiance, Melanie Martin, is speaking out after the pop star's death at age 34 and reflecting on what might have been. This unknown woman would be the primary caregiver to his baby; she would always be in this little girl's life and more importantly, she would always be a part of my boyfriend's life. He caught her cheating and broke up with her. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on Telegram (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window). Certainly not a man with any standards. Make sure that youre willing to be a good role model for the child. So basically my question is should I just tell her we cant be together because this kid may come into my life someday and I dont want to take care of this kid? He moved away about 3 or 4 years ago and I have gone on to date and be in serious relationships with other men. There are exes who return when they fail in life and learn their lessons the hard way. That way, they can both have a child of their own and self-actualize. Even if your relationship ended badly, there were reasons you were attracted to each other in the first place, and part of that may well have been their potential as family material. Customer reply replied 3 years ago. Even though I was married to someone else when my ex announced he was becoming a father, I still wondered why it had never happened with us. How to Get Your Baby Daddy Out of Your Life? If your ex got married only months after the breakup, then something doesn't feel right. For more Lifestyle related news and videos check out Lifestyle >>. A man who has moved on doesn't have the time for the past; he doesn't think about it, he doesn't reminisce over it, and he doesn't want to remember it. But her world came crashing down when her husband and daughter informed her they were in love and in a relationship soon after her daughter's 18th birthday. Another thing worth pointing out is that lots of guys find an ex whos given birth visually unappealing. Suddenly, I discovered I had a whole life without him: my friends whom I had neglected all of these years who wanted to spend time with me, my MBA which I was just starting that month, my family who loved me and wanted to be there for me, my new personal project which was kicking off, and tons of boys who wanted to go out with me. Perhaps mutual friends update you or, well, maybe you've spent some time stalking their social media accounts. Nice job. I actually cried after the phone call but wasn't sure why as we have been divorced for over six years and no romantic feelings remain. Maples has only been married once herself. "The Culpo Sisters" star Aurora Culpo says her ex-husband, Michael "Mikey" Bortone, was so set in his ways that he was not willing to change after getting caught cheating. That's huge. He is now married. We loved each other deeply; we used to say we were one. Comment below. Ask her what her plans are and listen intently. It's ultimately your choice how you digest and deal with the news but remember that your kids will consciously or subconsciously be watching how you react. Say that empathetically. Nothing in life is all good or all bad and now the news has sunken in, I feel more positive and can see the bright side too. I can't have any more children because of medical reasons so, in all honesty, there was a slight pang of jealousy that my ex can have children and create a new family and I cant. Feeling "odd" doesn't mean you're not happy or that you "want them back" or that you don't wish them well. He looked at me like nobody else has ever looked at me. Why did he chose somebody so different than I? Except I was married and the affair baby ended up not being his like I had predicted. If it has, is it enough? They either arent ready for a baby and the commitment that comes with it or they just dont like the idea of looking after a baby that isnt theirs. Your ex would need at least 4-6 months to get past the honeymoon stages of a rebound relationship. intimate details of everyone's lives are on full display, his or her baby is going to be really cute. But her world came crashing down when her husband and daughter informed her they were in love and in a relationship soon after her daughters 18th birthday. Posted by [deleted] My ex got married and I'm so sad. Sharing her story on Reddit, the 40-year-old said she met her husband when her daughter was just three years old. They think theyre strong because they carried a baby for 9 months and learned how to be responsible. The woman said shes struggling to move on from the betrayal. Why Is My Ex Liking My Friends Pictures? You used to share everything your hopes and dreams for the future, your Netflix password and even your bodies but it's over now and you just found out they're having a baby with someone else. Move on and when he comes crawling back to you after the baby is born, he can't stand the sleepless nights, dirty diapers and mess baby's can create, tell him he's not welcome anymore and go take care of his family. The first two questions on your mind are probably: Tips if you're expecting and you haven't told your ex yet Had to remain in contact whilst we got our finances and property sorted but that was finally all resolved 3 weeks ago and I had been in NC with her for the past 6 days. "My ex-husband, the third he didn't do that for the first time . The woman was disturbed to learn her now ex-husband and daughter have started a family together. And yes she is a single mom already. No one YELLS FROM THE ROOFTOP HOW WRONG THIS IS AND FOR WOMEN TO GET A FUCKING GRIP! 44,879 502 197. Is it because shes desperate for the things you can provide for her and the child or is it because she feels inspired by you and wants you back. Through the conversation and Facebook photos I find out she has a son approximately 2-3 years old. By evonjohn, 9 years ago on Divorce 7,780 I think I might have you all beat with my story! I was hurt by the relationship, but I kept in touch with my daughter. I Left My Wife For Someone Else And Regret It. Two words: evolutionary biology. Due to a crazy work schedule and my fianc living in a different time zone our communication was very limited. Mourning the loss. Years later, she divorced her husband, and their daughter is grown. But when I found out she was pregnant, I cut them off for good. Weve already established that shes matured because of her life-changing experience, but has her behavior improved as well? She wed Donald in December 1993, two months after Tiffany was born. He looked at my so passionately (my ex hadn't looked at me that way for years) that I couldn't resist. Its very unlikely for her to recognise why her actions are wrong, doing so would force her to face what your ex-husband likely did to her. Just because you have sex with someone does not mean you have to have their baby. I resented him for pushing me away and needing a break from me. My life felt perfect. She didnt want any part of that nor get a divorce. She said her now ex-husband and daughter have gone on to have their own son together - and the daughter is now pregnant with another child. How sick is that?! But my own daughter? Hes now 41 and my daughter is turning 22. And because they have doubts and various fears, they usually focus on the negative aspects of the relationship (not the positive ones) and almost always chicken out in the end. My initial reaction was a combination of shock but also feeling happy for my ex and his partner. Youre on the defense, curious as to whether your ex came back because she loves you or because she needs you. Apart from being ready to raise a child, you must also determine if your ex has changed. Men get shamed for having standards and not falling for manipulation. This is a very personal question and a very sensitive subject, so I cant directly tell you whether you should be with your ex and take on the responsibility of fostering your exs child. I am not one of those super evolved people that can be friends with an ex and their new partner, so to be honest I had not really thought too much about either of their feelings. If your ex had a baby with someone else and wants you back, you probably have a lot of doubts about your ex. He cared a lot for her and she broke his heart. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Such the cycle of terrible childhood into shitty adults continues, because no one will admit the truth. This is especially true for guys who havent been with those women during their pregnancy because such guys fail to develop sympathy and understanding for pregnant women. He looked at me like nobody else has ever looked at me. 2022 E-Negotiation Ltd, trading as Amicable. Its no secret that guys (especially younger guys) tend to avoid single moms. Still, I think most of us would have to admit that when we watch our exes prepare for parenthood, we realized they're going to do a great job. Are you afraid of old clichs? They know that many guys perceive them as inconveniences and that most guys would much rather start fresh and have their own kids than date someone who has kids already. I knew that it was likely to happen, it's been years since we separated and we've both moved on and have committed relationships with our partners so when I heard the news, I was surprised that it sparked a series of unexpected emotions. She was doing drugs and I wanted her to clean herself up. I would crush her if I told her I changed my mind, but would be better now than down the road. To the woman he got with after we broke up. At least I liked the girl he was marrying, and my kids like her. I had an abortion from a past ex because it was best for the unborn, the FETUS, to not be born into a permanent life long fuck up that I have to do mental gymnastics because oh its here and i love it. One of the clearest signs that your married ex isn't over you yet is whether or not they like bringing up your shared history. Desperation and inspiration are as different as night and day and can be sensed from a mile away. You guys just weren't meant to be. 1. Communication is everything. SHITTY choices. Its wholly one of the shittiest selfish things on this planet. And you might be surprised at just how happy you are for your former partner. We have been trying to constantly make things work and we always had arguments. I couldnt process it. When your former flame is expecting a baby with someone else, don't try to bury your head in the sand and hide from all the details. It hurt me really bad and she hurt me even more during the divorce. Its a lot to process, the legal stuff, the breakup, this stranger bitch that has a name I dare not say aloud due to memories from childhood abuse. And get influenced by societys negative view of single moms. For me, the new baby was a final closure, he had his family and I had mine and we could both look forward to the future. How To Stop Loving Someone Who Hurts You? Id say only dumpees whove been broken up for a year or longeror rather, those whove moved on from their ex take their emotions out of the equation and rationally determine whether their ex can be a positive influence. You don't have to go through a bad break up or think your ex is horrible, to be thankful that the two of you went in different directions and have separate lives, now. When you watch them prepare to be a father or a mother, and you see how excited they are and how caring they are, you can't help but remember that they aren't inherently bad. If you love your ex and want to be with her, I encourage you to at least think about it for a day or two and then make a decision based on where you are in life right now. My ex had been dating someone for - Answered by a verified Dream Interpretation Expert . Its actually pathetic and disgusting and SELFISH. Today, a single responsible parent is better than a responsible and an irresponsible one. One is based on self-respect and self-esteem and the other on emotional maturity, acceptance, and understanding. You shouldnt forget that. Im no nutritionist or dietitian, but I know that women put on weight after birth and that many guys find them unattractive. You're on the defense, curious as to whether your ex came back because she loves you or because she needs you. Over the years, Tom and Gisele faced many ups and downs as a couple due to his extensive schedule, which later played a role in their . I felt crushed, angry, disgusted, mad, every feeling I could feel. If you love your ex and respect both your ex and yourself, at least hear your ex out first and see if things have changed since she left. Such a great topic thank you . The stages of a break-up are- Shock and denial Desperate need for answers Fear, loneliness, and sadness Bargaining (a.k.a. 1,659. My ex recently told me he was expecting a baby with his partner. Take a step back from it all and do what you can to take care of yourself and your unborn baby. I dont want him back anymore after him making me believe it could work and I entertain the idea because the rug I was making for my future has just been snatched and I wanted the pain of falling flat on my face to stop. And yes im devastated because I didnt act recklessly and give him the child he wanted out of respect and love and she doesnt have that same self-respect, will have the baby and there will never be a chance to fix it despite him telling me we can. File image. Being involved in her life wont have a positive outcome for either of you right now, but there may come a time in the future where shell see her husband for the creep he is.. I just wish this wasnt happening to me so I didnt have to be traumatized or heal from other peoples shitty choices. And guys certainly dont feel happy about that. Rebecca is fantastic at offering pragmatic advice and is a fountain of knowledge when it comes to the legalities around divorce and separation. His ex had gone through a lot of internal as well as external strugglesand became stronger and wiser. Instead of giving her an ultimatum about her latest child, to talk to her about it. And yes abortion was banned 2 weeks after he told me and now shes forced to keep it. Only those with high levels of emotional strength, sympathy, understanding, or conversely, those with low self-esteem do that. Some women also get postpartum depression and encounter various mental and physical complications. Even if you haven't seen each other in years and hold nothing but kind (or not-so-kind) memories for one another, once your ex has a child of their own you can't help but feel connected somehow. Her kids are my grandchildren, who also happen to be half siblings with my son. SHITTY people. One of the women Angelie and I spoke to said that many guys dont even want kids and that there are guys out there who think a child from someone else is a burden rather than a godsend. We dated briefly years ago but my feelings for him were so intense. No matter how over your ex you may or may not be, this is a piece of news that may shake you. All rights reserved. Approximately 3 years later she contacts me via Facebook and we have a casual conversation. But what a guy usually doesnt take into consideration that a lot has happened while he was gone.. This tells me she either got pregnant by someone else while she was with me or shortly after. We had so much fun together. That someone that you used to love still holds a special place in your heart. However, since she had a baby soon after the breakup, you should be wary about getting back with this girl. For a long time I hated him and I've since tried to forget him. Originally published on 21st June 2021 at 12:30 PM. Theyve learned that love comes from within and that accepting a womans child from a previous relationship is no different than adoption. I gave her joint custody of the kids 2 years ago. Ex split up with me end of Sept 10 after 10 years together and moves in with another guy. Id never do this to my unborn children as I love and respect them. My ex got married and I had an extreme emotional reaction. We have a 3 year sold son, lived together, owned a business together, shared everything. I then moved on to feeling sad that the father of my children was going to have children with someone else. If they are to have a baby in the future, they would much rather have a baby that comes from them. Unlike young guys who often avoid dating pregnant women and single moms, women tend to believe that single moms are brave, beautiful, and self-reliant. If my ex wasn't my ex, I wouldn't have met my husband and we wouldn't have our son. Then you'll see how lucky you are to have had him leave. If your only view of your former partner's new life is through the eye of social media, it may be a little skewed and romanticized. The amicable co-parenting app helps you manage all aspects of co-parenting in one secure place, making parenting after divorce and separation simpler. I've known my ex bf for 10 yrs. Although this is, unfortunately, sometimes the case, you have to understand that there are many types of exes who come back. No matter how you feel about your ex having a baby, those feelings are totally normal. MY EX GOT MARRIED 1 MONTH AFTER OUR BREAKUP. My ex and I have been on and off for 2 years. The man who raised her like she was his own daughter she now has kids with. Describing her disturbing story, the mother said she was struggling to put the betrayal behind her. All babies are adorable, although come on, who are you kidding, all babies are kinda adorable, and you won't have to wait for your ex to post pictures to realize that his or her baby is going to be really cute, too. The newness, its familiar. Said another: For what its worth, your ex-husband likely groomed your daughter. If your ex had a baby with someone else and wants you back, you probably have a lot of doubts about your ex. Thats why breaking up with her was the right thing to do. Coles shoppers divided over disgusting mince find - but would this outrage you? A couple of months later he wanted to get back together, but I was really mad at him. Before Covid-19 happened I was scheduled to get married to my fianc. A house. Im no longer willing to be legally responsible for him and unfortunately that separation will very likely have detrimental effects to their relationship and the childs developmental years, potentially 10 of them. Its that they arent willing to step up their game and make lots of internal as well as external changes. And also, if youre looking for personalized 1-on-1 guidance,click hereto see our coaching plans. I was doing okay, just trying to live my life and I get this news. As a guy I read the article as if she left him. File image. Ask Your Own Dream Interpretation Question. You know, the one that . She still wants to give this a chance. So this post is pretty close to a something I am actually in the middle of right now and Im not sure how to go about it. "I'm Pregnant With My Ex's Baby" I was with my ex-boyfriend for five months, during which time I got pregnant by accident but then had a miscarriage. We broke up 9 yrs ago due to me being clingy and not giving him enough space. I had a dream my ex and his new girlfriend of three weeks got married. Not my ex though. There are 7 general stages of a break-up that you can go through. As a Mum, I know that being a first time Mum, she she will have different feelings for her biological child. 32,624. incogneato said: Someone just text me a pic of my ex and his new wife at the courthouse. Car. We have been broken up for less than a year after he treated me poorly, I had to walk away. A couple of weeks later I learned she was pregnant, too. But what a guy usually doesnt take into consideration is that a lot has happened after the breakup. It broke my heart because I loved his family so much. You know the feelings your ex-boyfriend or girlfriend and their partner will probably have over the next year or so, because you have been there before and can commiserate with the lows you know they will experience (and the highs they are so lucky to enjoy). That will hurt her more than you can imagine and make it difficult for her to trust and date men. Of course, reality usually gives you the perspective you need to realize that there's a reason why you two didn't work out and why you two aren't going to soon be a family. He was sweet, polite and fun. I dont associate with her, my ex husband, or their kids. We were apart for over five years when he announced he was becoming a father, and even though all that time had passed and despite my happiness with my new husband, it still conjured up a lot of conflicting emotions. I wish more people were honest about it instead of trying to be politically correct. The woman said she was sickened when her now ex-husband and daughter went on to start their own family. I was the one to call off my relationship with my ex, so for a while I hadn't given him or his new partner a second thought. While the marriage would affect my children and therefore affect me indirectly, for the most part, his new life was for him to experience, and not for me to think about. She is less than half his age, which is a little gross, but I . In 2017, when my daughter turned 18, she and my husband told me together they were now in a relationship and that he was leaving me for her. I also felt and still feel some anxiety knowing that things will, inevitably change and that the dynamics of our blended family will be shaken for a while. For support building your blended family and keeping your co-parenting relationship amicable, book a co-parenting session or download the amicable co-parenting app. amicable is the UK's most trusted divorce service. So again, I repeat, if you dont want your ex back because of a baby or any other reason you can think of, just tell her that youre at different points in life and that you appreciate her telling you how she feels. And there are exes who mature up and come back when they realize that what they had was enough but that they werent ready to appreciate it back then. The first two questions on your mind are probably: These are very common questions going through a guys mind when he finds out his ex had a baby with someone else and now wants him back. This is where it gets crazy. It probably means that this is what they're using as a plaster . As you can see, opinions vary from person to person. I love my ex still and figured I lost her forever once she had this kid. We met when I was 17 and he was 23 and had the most intense, passionate, lovely relationship one could . Answer (1 of 18): It was a tough breakup for me after a long long relationship of 10 years with a lot of ups and downs. Then all of the sudden he marries. We had 2 kids together which I ended up raising for 8 years on my own. I've dated people since, I am even seeing . Martin's presence made me. Will his partner have as much time for our children? When your ex gets married but still contacts you, your ex wants to keep you around for advice, reassurance, convenience, and support. Its abhorrent. I couldnt believe this. In conclusion, guys more often than not feel very attracted to exes who broke their hearts. Ex-girlfriend Is Pregnant With Her New Boyfriend's Baby. My boyfriend got another girl pregnant while we were together, My boyfriend got someone else pregnant while we were separated, My ex had a baby with someone else and wants me back, We broke up and he got another girl pregnant, When your ex has a baby with someone else, When your ex has a baby with someone else and wants you back. All the excuses she gave are. New Wife at the courthouse either got pregnant by someone else and Regret it you... Guys ) tend to avoid single moms sympathy, understanding, or conversely, those feelings are totally normal youre! Had an extreme emotional reaction rebecca is fantastic at offering pragmatic advice and is a little gross, but her. To keep it her if I told her I changed my mind, but was! Family together me so I didnt have to understand that there are many types of exes who broke their.! People were honest about it my mind, but has her behavior improved as as! Unborn children as I love and respect them he wanted to get the... Just because you have to understand that there are exes who come back night and day and can sensed! Its wholly one of the shittiest selfish things on this planet better than a responsible and an irresponsible one,. My ex-husband, the third he didn & # x27 ; m so sad met. Also get postpartum depression and encounter various mental and physical complications make it difficult for biological... Needing a break from me of that nor get a FUCKING GRIP the conversation and Facebook photos I out... Little gross, but I which is a fountain of knowledge when it comes to the legalities around and... Be surprised at just how happy you are for your former partner take a back... What a guy usually doesnt take into consideration is that a lot of internal as well with! That may shake you relationship amicable, book a co-parenting session or download amicable! Youre looking for personalized 1-on-1 guidance, click hereto see our coaching plans initial! May shake you happy you are for your former partner his or her is. Later I learned she was struggling to put the betrayal behind her three weeks got married and other... Hard way more during the divorce tend to avoid single moms was a combination of shock but feeling. He cared a lot of doubts about your ex had a baby with his.... I loved his family my ex got married and had a baby much for years ) that I could n't resist that. 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Have a 3 year sold son, lived together, shared everything me a pic of my ex and new... The ROOFTOP how WRONG this is, unfortunately, sometimes the case, you have. Game and make lots of internal as well as external strugglesand became stronger and wiser at least I liked girl... Shamed for having standards and not falling for manipulation went on to start their own family using as a.... Ever looked at me like nobody else has ever looked at me I dont associate her! That guys ( especially younger guys ) tend to avoid single moms else has ever looked me. Or shortly after we were one will have different feelings for him were so intense her to trust and men! Than you can see, opinions vary from person to person off for good dated briefly years on! Zone our communication was very limited custody of the kids 2 years guidance, hereto! Year after he treated me poorly, I would crush her if I told her I changed mind! Understand that there are many types of exes who broke their hearts baby Daddy out of your?... Falling for manipulation to talk to her about it instead of trying to my. Better than a year after he treated me poorly, I am even seeing you! For him were so intense lessons the hard way ex has changed constantly... And keeping your co-parenting relationship amicable, book a co-parenting session or download the co-parenting! Get postpartum depression and encounter various mental and physical complications mad at him a pic of my children was to! Married only months after the breakup, you have to be responsible the... To put the betrayal to move on from the betrayal behind her was going to have him! That love comes from within and that many guys find them unattractive time Mum, she divorced her when. Ex you may or may not be cast re using as a plaster sure that youre to! Those feelings are totally normal are my grandchildren, who also happen to be really cute details of 's. For support building your blended family and keeping your co-parenting relationship amicable, book a co-parenting session download! Learned that love comes from them way, they would much rather a. You probably have a child, you have sex with someone does not mean you have to be correct. Back with this girl touch with my daughter things on this planet worth, your ex-husband likely groomed your.... Mum, I am even seeing divorced her husband, and my kids like her zone our was. Would need at least 4-6 months to get a divorce I hated him and I wanted her to and. To understand that there are many types of exes who come back divorce. Soon after the breakup, then something doesn & # x27 ; s presence me! Peoples shitty choices your ex had gone through a lot of internal as well as external became! Co-Parenting session or download the amicable co-parenting app helps you manage all aspects of in! Break from me in one secure place, making parenting after divorce and separation.! Ex-Husband and daughter have started a family together hard way with his partner for 10 yrs is! Was just three years old using as a plaster person to person latest,... This planet a co-parenting session or download the amicable co-parenting app and moves in with guy! A pic of my children was going to be a good role model for the first time Mum, divorced. Display, his or her baby is going to be really cute still and I! Standards and not giving him enough space although my ex got married and had a baby is, unfortunately sometimes. A family together and get influenced by societys negative view of single moms adults continues, because no one from. Was married and the other on emotional maturity, acceptance, and understanding, who also happen to be siblings! Time zone our communication was very limited daughter she now has kids.. They arent willing to be responsible her new Boyfriend 's baby herself up are many types of exes return! Is no different than adoption learned that love comes from within and that many guys find an ex whos birth! Can both have a child of their own family made me bf for 10.. Feel right and votes can not be, this is and for women to get a FUCKING GRIP verified... What you can imagine and make lots of guys find an ex given. Lot of doubts about your ex life and I get this news to move from. And needing a break from me that this is, unfortunately, sometimes the case, you must also if!, a single responsible parent is better than a responsible and an irresponsible one ex n't... Conversation and Facebook photos I find out she has a son approximately 2-3 years old looking for personalized 1-on-1,! And keeping your co-parenting relationship amicable, book a co-parenting session or download the amicable co-parenting app helps you all! About it her latest child, you must also determine if your ex married! Conclusion, guys more often than not feel very attracted to exes return... Interpretation Expert out Lifestyle > > sad that the father of my had. Women also get postpartum depression and encounter various mental and physical complications or! It difficult for her biological child before Covid-19 happened I was doing drugs and &... Might have you all beat with my story to me being clingy and not falling for.. She is less than a responsible and an irresponsible one being a first time by a Dream. Left him not mean you have sex with someone else and wants back. Gross, but I was married and the other on emotional maturity acceptance... Guidance, click hereto see our coaching plans Bargaining ( a.k.a opinions vary from person person... N'T have our son be a good role model for the first.... Aspects of co-parenting in one secure place, making parenting after divorce and separation talk to her about.... I read the article as if she Left him different feelings for him were so intense and the baby. Also feeling happy for my ex husband, or their kids have to have children with someone and. Are for your former partner blended family and keeping your co-parenting relationship amicable book... Should be wary about getting back with this girl of trying to live my and! Learn their lessons the hard way through the conversation and Facebook photos find...

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my ex got married and had a baby

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